Valve just updated their List of the hottest new releases on Steam for the month of November. There are the usual suspects like Crysis 2 And the 3, Spider-Man: Miles MoralesAnd the acoustic boundaries. There is also the best single player game of the year, repentanceIt’s a neat little pixely extraction shooter He caught our attention a few months ago zero sv. But one of the top 20 best-selling Steam games last month was, of all things, a fucking police sim.
released last month, Police Simulator: Patrol Officers The film takes place in the fictional American city of Brighton. The game asks you to “get the badge” as a cop, which actually means harassing citizens with citations for traffic violations, getting arrested for drug possession, “chasing graffiti”, and other cop things. It currently holds “very positive” review status, with several active and former law enforcement officers sharing in the comments, and others who haven’t gotten enough of bullying people into childhood weighing in as well.
One reviewer summarizes a typical experience at Police simulator. It is written like a poem (and you should read it like this):
I have started my first shift.
I saw Lady Jay walking by, so I stopped her.
She looked nervous, so I asked for her ID.
Then I decided to look for her.
I shot her with my stun gun.
I found a switch blade and human teeth, so I arrested her.
She asked for a back-up, and they threw her into the pie cart.
Cleaning the streets one person at a time.
I mean where do I start with this? Honestly, that makes that Call of duty level from the last game look tame. And what about human teeth? Do developers assume people carry such things, and do typical street cops spend most of their time thwarting murders with a penchant for biting teeth? “First person I looked at that found human teeth. 10/10” reads another review.
Other reviews suggest that this is a fairly straightforward civic duty sim that is lacking in features. It seems that this boring job does not live up to everyone’s hopes. Another Steam review reads:
professionals[sic]: be a cop.
cons[sic]: he can’t be a bad cop.
The first thing I did was get my gun out and shoot a lady who was walking in the road and I got fired from the job. I wasn’t even able to do the remaining 16 shots in my magti before reloading and yelling at her not to move.
Fun game, but a bit unrealistic.
7/10 – Worth it for crashing into your police car [sic] In the slums and escape from the scene.
Another review reads “shoot first later”. “This game was a lot of fun at first,” but unlike LSPDFR’s mod Grand Theft Auto V-You have to play through the duties of a real cop. You don’t have real freedom to get around it.”
I’ve played a lot of GTAa game where you regularly do terrible things to people, but this game seems a little weird to me. Maybe I shouldn’t throw stonesThere are other dubious examples Uses of tone deaf for police images in games. But it’s hard not to read comments from people who bemoan it A game designed to simulate daily police work Which is mostly, boring civil crimes like traffic violations aren’t exciting enough because they don’t give you enough opportunities to shoot people.
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